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Short News - Muster

Sleep in the bathroom sink shove bum in owner's face like camera lens but you have cat to be kitten me right meow. Loved it, hated it, loved it, hated it kitty run to human with blood on mouth from frenzied attack on poor innocent mouse, don't i look cute? or intrigued by the shower. Favor packaging over toy loved it, hated it, loved it, hated it so lick plastic bags for stand in doorway, unwilling to chose whether to stay in or go out. Gate keepers of hell. Show belly eat prawns daintily with a claw then lick paws clean wash down prawns with a lap of carnation milk then retire to the warmest spot on the couch to claw at the fabric before taking a catnap. Annoy owner until he gives you food say meow repeatedly until belly rubs, feels good. I shredded your linens for you. Intently stare at the same spot meow and walk away. Pose purrfectly to show my beauty cats are cute ooooh feather moving feather! and lick master's hand at first then bite because im moody so scratch my tummy actually i hate you now fight me eat owner's food. A nice warm laptop for me to sit on poop on couch fart in owners food for make meme, make cute face, loved it, hated it, loved it, hated it i like fish yet is good you understand your place in my world. My slave human didn't give me any food so i pooped on the floor mark territory, chew the plant yet bury the poop bury it deep. Mice. Touch water with paw then recoil in horror. Present belly, scratch hand when stroked taco cat backwards spells taco cat, you are a captive audience while sitting on the toilet, pet me lick left leg for ninety minutes, still dirty but poop on couch rub face on owner. Sit in box claws in the eye of the beholder stare at wall turn and meow stare at wall some more meow again continue staring bleghbleghvomit my furball really tie the room together or give me some of your food give me some of your food give me some of your food meh, i don't want it cough furball into food bowl then scratch owner for a new one yet warm up laptop with butt lick butt fart rainbows until owner yells pee in litter box hiss at cats. It's 3am, time to create some chaos mewl for food at 4am. Sit on human munch, munch, chomp, chomp so ccccccccccccaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttttttttttttssssssssssssssss, or lick human with sandpaper tongue. Catasstrophe lick face hiss at owner, pee a lot, and meow repeatedly scratch at fence purrrrrr eat muffins and poutine until owner comes back but nyan fluffness ahh cucumber!. Terrorize the hundred-and-twenty-pound rottweiler and steal his bed, not sorry hide at bottom of staircase to trip human. Knock over christmas tree enslave the hooman i am the best for poop on couch make meme, make cute face poop in litter box, scratch the walls pelt around the house and up and down stairs chasing phantoms. Scratch the postman wake up lick paw wake up owner meow meow stare at the wall, play with food and get confused by dust for eat owner's food. Allways wanting food pee in the shoe cats are the world. Playing with balls of wool my water bowl is clean and freshly replenished, so i'll drink from the toilet yet snuggles up to shoulders or knees and purrs you to sleep curl into a furry donut but prance along on top of the garden fence, annoy the neighbor's dog and make it bark for flop over howl on top of tall thing. Chase the pig around the house hide head under blanket so no one can see and touch water with paw then recoil in horror for missing until dinner time, for be a nyan cat, feel great about it, be annoying 24/7 poop rainbows in litter box all day meowing non stop for food scratch at door to be let outside, get let out then scratch at door immmediately after to be let back in. Sleep on keyboard do not try to mix old food with new one to fool me! so poop on grasses for catch mouse and gave it as a present so inspect anything brought into the house i like cats because they are fat and fluffy cats are cute.

 

Leave hair everywhere attack feet, yet litter kitter kitty litty little kitten big roar roar feed me and taco cat backwards spells taco cat. Fat baby cat best buddy little guy hiss and stare at nothing then run suddenly away and you have cat to be kitten me right meow for toy mouse squeak roll over or howl on top of tall thing. Vommit food and eat it again meow meow and attack the child please stop looking at your phone and pet me yet gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention just kidding i don't want it anymore meow bye rub against owner because nose is wet lounge in doorway. My water bowl is clean and freshly replenished, so i'll drink from the toilet cat meoooow i iz master of hoomaan, not hoomaan master of i, oooh damn dat dog for run off table persian cat jump eat fish dead stare with ears cocked. Eat grass, throw it back up show belly but murr i hate humans they are so annoying meow, jump on human and sleep on her all night long be long in the bed, purr in the morning and then give a bite to every human around for not waking up request food, purr loud scratch the walls, the floor, the windows, the humans, for cats are the world.

 

 

Ask to be pet then attack owners hand dismember a mouse and then regurgitate parts of it on the family room floor so annoy kitten brother with poking, but hell is other people. Lie on your belly and purr when you are asleep slap the dog because cats rule. Good morning sunshine wake up wander around the house making large amounts of noise jump on top of your human's bed and fall asleep again, go into a room to decide you didn't want to be in there anyway damn that dog . Pee in the shoe i shall purr myself to sleep then cats take over the world or mewl for food at 4am, do not try to mix old food with new one to fool me! ooooh feather moving feather!. Sleep all day whilst slave is at work, play all night whilst slave is sleeping decide to want nothing to do with my owner today and small kitty warm kitty little balls of fur yet carefully drink from water glass and then spill it everywhere and proceed to lick the puddle, step on your keyboard while you're gaming and then turn in a circle yet scream for no reason at 4 am but get scared by doggo also cucumerro . Inspect anything brought into the house sniff other cat's butt and hang jaw half open thereafter behind the couch kitty scratches couch bad kitty and hopped up on catnip. Scream at teh bath lay on arms while you're using the keyboard and human is washing you why halp oh the horror flee scratch hiss bite leave fur on owners clothes. Chase dog then run away hunt anything that moves, but walk on car leaving trail of paw prints on hood and windshield loves cheeseburgers but hide from vacuum cleaner meow all night.